Work and Life Will Never Be Balanced

Life is always a game of scheduling. School, work, sports, parenting, cleaning, eating, sleeping....the list goes on and this isn't even the fun stuff! When I moved away for college was when I became obsessed with balancing all the things I have to do in a day. In my head I wanted everything perfectly balanced and a secret system to make it super easy. Basically it consists of me making listings, crying that there is too much to do and not enough time and then procrastinating so I can do things I really want to do and not what I should be doing. Does this sound familiar?

Last year. 2015, I focused on my art business and really tried to get a routine going. Did it work? Not so much. By the end of the year I realized I was so hyper focused on business I couldn't enjoy life. To top it off I let housework slip and many nights didn't make dinner for my family. Gasp! This makes me sound like a horrible human being right? It became very apparent to me that I wasn't balancing work and life as well as I taught I had.

2016 came and I had all these lofty goals of business things i was going to do and all the time i was going to make for family fun and keep my house clean. Then May showed up and it's almost half way through the year. How have I done? Ehhhh...not super. I started again hyper focused on my business trying to be the best and more in all the endeavors that came my way. Then I noticed it again especially when my daughter told me "We don't go anywhere any more." Well it was winter but I did use this line often "Mommy is busy I have (insert task) here to do. I just can't right now". That is okay to say but I really started to pay attention to every day and how often I said it. Shamefully I said it every day. I was always busy and I was always going to be busy and there would always be work.

That was when I pulled back the reigns on work. My art career wasn't going to die if I wasn't going full speed. I emailed and talked to the people I was working with to tell them I really needed to focus on my daughter while I had the time before she goes to Kindergarten in the fall. My daughter will be in school and then I will have all that time to do my business and focus on her after school. It sounds perfect but I know it won't be that easy. Until then....I've really paired down my work habits.

What does this have to do with the picture? Well, the hustle was wearing me out and I wasn't getting closer to any goals. I had to step back and ask myself how was I going to get more organized. There are notebooks all around my studio with a list here and a list there, a planner, a calendar, papers stacking up on my desk with hashtags, todos, notes and deadlines. This is when I discovered bullet journaling and it sounded just like what I was doing but all in one place. Duh! Why didn't I think of this before. Off I went obsessing over making the perfect "planner" and a separate bullet journal for business and home tasks that last all year. Now I have all my goals in one place, with habits I want to keep tabs on, my daily to do lists, and house chores chart.

May was the start and so far so good. I feel more accomplished when I can see all my boxes checked off. It's become easier to see what house chores I have been neglecting for too long. Each day I try to get more checks and more of my goals accomplished. As for work and life balance it seems like a lie. It's not perfectly balanced all the time. Some days there is more work, other days more family, and some days more cleaning. Now when my daughter says she bored or wants to go somewhere I think before I say "I'm busy" and make the time first to be with her and then do the other tasks. Then I can confidently say I have spent the quality time and didn't let this precious time fly by just because I was busy.

#work #productivity